Autumn Comes

“Autumn Comes

The summer is past

Winter will come too soon

The stars will be nearer

Skies are clearer

Under the harvest moon”

                                                          --Lullaby Sterling loves

Fall is here, at least almost.  In this Indian Summer we are

having it seems the seasons can’t quite decide how to proceed.

But the leaves are changing, and there are some chilly days.

I love watching, celebrating, pondering, and living the seasonal cycle.  There is something so comforting for me in it.  Part of this, I believe, is the insight into my own life, my own cycles I am given when taking the time to observe the energy of each season.

To me summer’s energy is an expansive haze.  Mother Nature takes the lead and we only need follow.  There is so much life buzzing around it feels as if the only thing to do is sit back and enjoy it.  The Earth herself provides all the entertainment and nourishment.

Then Fall comes.  There is a quickening of energy.  Animals scurry to prepare for the coming winter.  Mother Nature provides her bounty for us to gather.  After a season of absorbing and watching Nature create, my own creative energy awakens.  It allows me to tackle home projects and new skills.

Then there comes the winter.  Our Earth tells us she is going to rest, we must find our way on our own for a bit.  And what creativity of spirit springs forth during this season.  It is one of my favorites because the light of the human spirit shines so brightly.  With the withdrawal of nature’s energy, the human energy bursts forth with song, celebration, and tradition. 

It is as I am moving as a parent into the winter of my pregnancy in which I often have to say to my own children “Mama is resting.  You must find something to do on your own” and watching as they too shine forth with their own ideas and energy as Mama withdraws her own energies and simply watches

And waits. 

Knowing Spring, the awakening again of energy and life, is just around the corner.

Seeing Grace

I have been organizing my pictures lately.

This is always such a heartwarming process for me.  I find that often when I think back to my family’s beginnings I think about the things I did  not know and did not do, not really with any blame or guilt, but just an acknowledgement that it was not easy at the beginning.  Each beginning with each child had its unique challenges.

Noelle at 1 week

Sterling at 2 weeks

And then I look at the pictures.  I see the way Noelle looked at me with such wonder and love in her eyes.  And I realize she wasn’t really paying attention to all those inadequacies.  She was content to have a mama who loved her.

I remember the overwhelming busy-ness of our lives with Sterling in his pre-crawling days.  And then I look at all the pictures of his beautiful smile and realize he didn’t care.  He was enraptured with it all.

The pictures in my life serve as a reminder to myself that I can choose to focus my attention, just as my children did, just as my camera does.

It is true that it is very easy to capture good pictures in beautiful scenery.  But beauty can be captured anywhere.  Move a little clutter here, clear some space there, open the window, take just the right angle….

Beauty appears.

Just as the photographer trains himself to see light and shadows, lines and angles, color and symmetry, I want to train my internal lens to focus on love, joy, tenderness, and playfulness.

 

Just as the photographer’s eye becomes skilled at seeing beauty, I want to train my spirit to See Grace.

And perhaps, one day, I won’t even need those pictures as reminder of how beautiful my life is

And always was.