Broken Open

“Only when you offer yourself as bread, broken and given, to a hungry world, will you ever be satisfied”

I have read many quotes of late that refer to the idea that the only thing we truly have is what we give.  It reminds me of a quote from the movie “Into the Wild”

“Happiness is only real if shared”

I feel like I am finally beginning to feel the truth of this paradox. 

Motherhood will do that to you. 

It is in the constant breaking of identity, of what I thought I needed, what I thought defined me,

and instead growing bigger, giving more,

letting more Light shine through…

it is in this process that I seem to become more myself, which I believe someone once said was the Light of the World…

Because you cannot receive until you can give.

And you cannot give until you are broken

Like Bread

So perfect sitting on the counter

In its apparent wholeness

It is the breaking which nourishes

And so I am breaking my way

To Wholeness, to Holiness.

So many times it will feel like too much, the challenge too big, and I will retreat back into the safety of taking, drawing those lines in the sand…

And as those lines push against the surface of my heart, constricting it with their rigidity, I let the surf wash them away

Let myself become as big as the ocean

And let my world swim in its waves.