Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Summer Recap

Summer has come and gone and Fall, like an old friend, has faithfully returned. And like an old friend, we easily fall into routine with him again. Cooking, walking, lighting candles, good music all have returned to us as if they had never been gone.

Looking back on the summer, it was difficult in many ways for us because of the heat, but it was also so extraordinary. Stephen and I got to watch our first baby grow into a child, into a person, a person we are both just so enchanted with. I have often felt

"What do I have to offer this little person who is already so many of the things I wish my children to grow to be? "

All I can do is be here.

And so that is what I do.

I am here to witness all her moments of doing and saying new things.
I am here to laugh with her when something is funny.

I am here to laugh at her when she is playing the clown.

I am here to share her wonder at something beautiful.

I am here to hold her when she is hurt.

I am here to be her steeping stool when she wants to reach for the stars.

I am here to be who I am so she can see what it is like to be an adult in this world.

And amazingly, being here has been enough. Letting go of the expectation that I have to do, to teach, to mold or lead in some overt way has opened up a relationship with Noelle that I am grateful for every day I wake up and every night I go to bed.

I have heard the phrase "Children should come with instruction manuals."
I think they do. It is them.

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