Thursday, January 1, 2009

What Is Gone, What is Yet to Come


Happy 2009!

The New Year Day has such a reflective feel to it, a time when what has been, what is, and what will be melt into each other, making me feel sad and eager all at once. Sad to say goodbye to times that will never be again, except in my heart. Eager to know what lies ahead for me. Content now to fully feel every moment slip by because never is it so apparent as now how fleeting time is. I want to take a few moments to write on 2008, such a special year for us here.

On this day last year I was very pregnant, had just hastily changed my care provider from a doctor to midwife after it became apparent my doctor and I disagreed on how Noelle's birth should go. I assumed she would be coming in less than a week, on her due date. She waited much longer than that.

Noelle was born and everything in me changed forever. I remember thinking to myself that when I was in labor with her and she was moving through me, I could swear I felt God. That was shocking to me since I didn't even know if I believed in God. But there it was, creation occuring through me, the most magical and sacred of all things in this w0rld, the beginning of a life. And I had the honor of bearing witness to it.

The next parts of 2008 are such a jumble of emotions and memories. So much joy. So many tears. So much maturing. I became a mother. Not just in words. My soul became a mother's soul.
Stephen and I married in Clark Gardens on our anniversary of meeting.

Last year I thought I would be living in Dallas for several more years as I completed my medical training. But a mother's soul will not leave her baby. And so I realized my path was to lead elsewhere. And I gladly followed it.

I moved near my family, to a small town that I adore for its quaintness, a town that continually greets us with more and more wonderful surprises and people that make us feel so grateful to be raising our family here.

Stephen got his feet wet in what will hopefully become a flourishing business for him.

The first African American President was elected. Boy does it feel good to write that.

And as the economy fell around us, and the divisiveness of an election reigned this last part of the year, I felt immune to it all as I was surrounded by so many people that I love. Living near my family feels so nice --watching my little one run around with all her cousins, seeing my mother and sister whenever I feel like it.

A person could almost burst from all they have. A beautiful year it was, 2008.

Cheers to the adventures that wait in 2009.

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